By Reynaldo Mena
A memory of her high school graduation came to mind. While all around her there was joy, laughter, and hugs, Susana MarroquÃn occasionally glanced towards the stands. There was her father David, very ill with kidney disease. The girl feared that the intense heat might harm him, and he would collapse next to Ruby, her mother.
“That period was very difficult. We were very busy with everything, my dad’s illness, the full-time care he needed, and our financial situation. At times, I questioned if this was living, but as my mom used to tell me, it is what it is, and we have to do it,” recalls Dr. MarroquÃn now.
Life experiences have given MarroquÃn the wisdom and compassion to understand each of her clients who come to her seeking a way to understand and straighten out their lives.
“There are times when I break down, I have to hide a tear, a sense of helplessness. My life has been tough, and my practice Wellness para la mama as a therapist has given me the opportunity to understand that there are cases harder or less difficult than my life. But it’s not about that; it’s about understanding ourselves and helping improve any situation, no matter what it is,” says Dr. MarroquÃn.
Born in Los Angeles to a Guatemalan father and Salvadoran mother, MarroquÃn grew up in a hardworking, close-knit family with many needs.
“We were very humble. My father worked all the time, and my mother sometimes cleaned houses to help. She always instilled in me the importance of education, of bettering myself. I remember she attended night classes, wanting to learn, and she always took me with her, placed me at the back of the classroom, and I spent my time coloring,” says this psychologist based in Long Beach.
Susana Marroquin was part of an immigrant family, like many others in the area around MacArthur Park.
“We loved walking around that area, the food, the people, the park,” she tells me. “But when I reached the 6th grade, my mom decided to send me to a school in the Valley. There were many problems with violence in that area, and she didn’t want me to attend those schools.”
MarroquÃn had to travel an hour and a half to get to her school, and even longer if she stayed to play basketball after classes.
“I was very good; I played the Power Forward position… like Kobe, well, not like Kobe,” she says with laughter. “But in the position he sometimes played. I was very good, I often looked to score, the contact with our rivals, the power, it was very decisive.”
However, in addition to the hardships her family was already facing, in the tenth grade, her father fell ill with kidney disease and needed to spend a lot of time in intensive care.
“Our life changed even more. It was just us; we had no other relatives, just the three of us… like the Three Musketeers, we always stuck together, and now we had to face this together,” she says.
They found a way to cope with this situation. But things got even more complicated when Susana MarroquÃn started studying at Cal State-Long Beach.
“I started working part-time when I was 15, during the summers. While my friends or acquaintances went on Spring Break, I had to work and help take care of my father. I remember many times feeling helpless and asking myself, ‘Why me? This is not youth. Why couldn’t I take vacations?’ My mom sometimes apologized, told me it wasn’t fair for me to live that way, but she also made me understand that it was what we had to do and face,” Susana MarroquÃn recalls.
Having lived in the MacArthur Park area and facing many hardships could have exposed her to gang violence that plagued the area, but it didn’t.
“My relationship with my mom prevented me from falling into bad company. I also had some counselors and coaches who were always by my side. My mother always insisted that I study, despite everything,” she remembers.
“Many times, I was in class, and my mom would contact me and tell me they had hospitalized my father, that I had to go there quickly because he might not make it. I would leave immediately; that happened many times. Dialysis weakened my dad a lot, but I saw his struggle against this disease, and that motivated me,” she adds.
Susana MarroquÃn wanted to become a pediatrician, but a chemistry class changed her mind.
“I told myself, ‘I’m not from here; I won’t be able to handle this,’ and so she chose psychology.
To help with the family’s finances, she took various temporary jobs, as a clerk, in nonprofit organizations, wherever she could. The Three Musketeers had to make it through.
“My father’s illness, my mother’s struggle, my own life taught me never to give up. That was one of the great things I learned, I learned from the blows,” she says.
Susana MarroquÃn had always heard about the hardships they had endured since she was a child; she didn’t want to go through that, she had to contribute.
The irony of life prepared her for this.
Her father fell ill in 1996 with kidney disease, and all that time was spent in treatments, dialysis, hospitalizations.
His hope was to receive a kidney transplant that would save his life. And not only that, if he managed to get a kidney, it had to be compatible for him to survive.
“In 2002, we got the transplant, everything went well, but other complications arose. He developed diabetes, suffered the amputation of one of his toes, and we went through very difficult times. But later on, he improved, incredibly, everything was under control, diabetes stabilized, the kidney working well. We thought the health problem was behind us; he was eating well, and we thought we had finally overcome everything, and then, a car hit him, and he died as a result of the injuries,” says the psychologist.
This was in 2015; Susana MarroquÃn was already married, with a child, but her marriage was falling apart.
“My mother was in El Salvador, she had to fly urgently, my father was already in a coma, there was nothing to be done,” she adds.
All these life experiences have made her more transparent, more compassionate with her patients, and stronger in her work.
“I express all of this with the people who come to me. I share when it’s necessary; I don’t hide it. I need our community to see that people in my position have also struggled and suffered in this life,” says MarroquÃn.
One of the pillars of her therapy is spirituality, and she doesn’t understand it solely as a religious element.
“I mean having connections, it can be with nature, with family members, or with people who have passed away. I pray to connect with my father. When I seek him, I go to the sea, it was his favorite place, and there I feel connected with him,” she adds.
MarroquÃn believes that the Latino community is more open to seeking help, going to therapy, and understanding that mental health is something that involves everyone.
“As I tell them, ‘if you want a different result, you have to do something different,'” she says.
Susana MarroquÃn remembers what the staff at the clinic her father went to used to tell her.
“He always talked about you. They were taking care of him, and he wouldn’t stop talking about you; he was very proud of what you’ve accomplished,” Susana Marroquin shares.
Although her mother’s words are always with her, repeating them over and over again.
“You’re where you are because you worked hard,” her mother tells her.
